Desire Pearl TR from a TTR-lover's perspective

Discussion in 'Desire Pearl' started by hot_2_trot, Feb 24, 2015.

  1. hot_2_trot

    hot_2_trot Guest

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    Hello all you crazy CCC people!

    Ryan and I just got back from a weeklong Mexican adventure. We spent 4 nights (Feb 14-18) at TTR with a huge group of friends/repeaters from the week 8/Shitshow crowd, and then defected to Desire Pearl for 3 nights (Feb 18-21). Since I found it hard to get a really good idea of what Desire Pearl (DP) is REALLY like from a TTR vet’s perspective, I decided to give you my thoughts and experiences.

    Firstly, let me remind you that the context in which we arrived from Pearl was from the best Shitshow at TTR we’ve experienced in the past 5 trips during week 8. Absolute balls-to-the-wall shenanigans and craziness, complete with outfits, Fireball, pool games, dancing, and tons of amped-up fun.

    We didn’t sign up for Steve’s boobs cruise on Wednesday, our day to arrive at Pearl, but saw the group off on the boat. I was so pumped to see the absolute disaster that was going to be that group after the cruise that I talked Ryan into staying at TTR until after the boat arrived back at the dock at 4:30pm. So, we spent all of our leaving day chilling at TTR and then partying with the wild bunch that got off the boat after the cruise.

    Needless to say, after partying with all our friends after the post-boobs cruise party, we were NOT SOBER when we got to Pearl. We grabbed a cab (we didn’t pre-arrange USA Transfers from TTR to DP, knowing that we didn’t want to be on a schedule that day) and headed to Pearl, drinks in hand.

    So that gives you the context in which we arrived at Pearl, and the mindset we were in at the time.

    Now, on to the Desire Pearl from this girl’s experience: firstly, I’ve been wanting to go to Pearl for a few years, but Ryan was a bit reluctant as the price was so much more than TTR. After hanging with the Octoberbreasters this past October and hearing from Kyle & Jen just how awesome DP is, we decided to split the trip. I had super-high expectations and was very excited to go, despite not really wanting to leave the Shitshow at TTR. We did have 2 couples from the Shitshow who joined us our second day, so we weren’t totally alone at Pearl.

    We paid $700/night for a regular room. This is more than we’ve ever paid for any room anywhere in the US, Caribbean, or several countries in Europe. I know, I know, it’s all-inclusive and we went during high season,, but this price (and what I’d heard about Pearl) set me up to expect a true, out-of-this-world, Ritz-Carlton quality resort, food, and ass-kissing service.

    What a disappointment.

    Resort in general: I mean, it’s nice, but not mind-blowing. Foliage is beautiful and more abundant than TTR. Buildings are 3 (I think) stories with stairs, no elevators, similar to TTR. Lobby is ok, store is quite shitty and tiny. Checkin and checkout--no hassle, no big deal, no alcohol given to you at check-in like at TTR. If you’re expecting a Vegas-resort style hotel with all the bells and whistles of the lobby and general features, you will disappointed. And for $700/night, I was expecting that.

    Rooms: Average. Again, they paled in comparison to regular rooms at Venetian or Palazzo in Vegas. We had a king-sized bed, which I was happy about (haven’t been able to get that at TTR last few trips). Bathroom is ok, not the highest end features by any stretch. Shower and tub are both pretty shitty. I like the double shower at TTR much better.

    There is a mini bar, can’t even remember what was in it. There’s also room service, which is a huge plus of DP over TTR, tbh.

    Pool: One big pool; we had unfortunately cooler-than-normal weather and they do NOT heat that pool at Desire. This pissed me off. There’s a swim-up bar at the main pool.

    Pool chairs: This was BY FAR the biggest fn scam ever. You have to tip the guys around the pool to even consider getting a chair, and it seems you have to do it early. For $700/night, in my opinion, every ass in that resort should have a chair around the pool. THIS IS NOT THE CASE, unless you feel like tipping a dude at least $20 every damn day, and I’m not sure that would guarantee you a chair, tbh. So you run around looking at empty chairs WITH NOTHING ON THEM and you can’t sit in one. One of our friends reserved chairs at the front desk at 4:30am with a $20, so I guess you can do that, too. But they will actually CHASE YOU OUT OF EMPTY CHAIRS in the morning saying they’re all “reserved.” What an fn joke. :sauer005:

    Hot tub: One big hot tub with nicely placed jets for ladies who like that :) Right on the benches. Hot tub was fn cold first day. We were pissed as hell about that. There’s a bar at the hot tub, and canopied day beds all around the hot tub.

    Beach: Nice, I guess. Canopied beds, and some regular chairs. Palm trees. MUCH smaller than TTR’s beach area. One volleyball net at the beach.

    Restaurants: Three: buffet, regular restaurant, and a sushi restaurant; the last is only open Fri/Sat (I think) and is the only one that requires reservations. Didn’t try the sushi place.

    --Buffet (called Aphrodite): The buffet is more elegantly decorated than TTR, and the noise level is a bit less. Not as many food options as at TTR, and there’s no short-order grill (that I saw or experienced). There’s a bar, but I never went to actually get a drink there as I saw no one doing that, which pissed me off, because I want my drink BEFORE my food which means I’d rather get it myself right when I walk in than wait for it after plating up--this is a huge peeve of mine. Food is overall more savory at DP.

    --Restaurant (called Pearl): Cheesily decorated with beads and these statues of ladies legs coming out of the wall. Food is ok. IT IS NOT 5 star food BY ANY STRETCH. Not at all. And at $700/night, I expect at least a 2-star Chicago restaurant quality. It was below that.

    Service: Not anything close to the ass-kiss I was hoping for. It’s friendly, and with a smile, but nothing above TTR, if you ask me.

    Drinks: They have more top-shelf liquor than TTR. Grey Goose, Makers, etc. No Fireball. And drinks tended to be strong. They have a few wine selections: chardonnay, sauv blanc, cab sauv, merlot. All house wines; you can order better wines if you want at the restaurant, and maybe the pool/hot tub bars, but I’m not sure about the latter, actually. If you like doing shots in the pool, THIS IS NOT HAPPENING, not from what I saw.

    People: 95% MUCH quieter and subdued than TTR. A lot of people are nude. I didn’t care about that; we were nude a lot and it’s just not a big deal once you’re there. Chilling, admiring themselves and their partner. Quite a bit of open sex, but quiet, partners-only sex from what I saw in public areas. Not as friendly as TTR, not by a long shot. We did have people talk to us, but it was nothing like the friendliness and openness you see at TTR.

    Another curiosity is that the women here far outdo the men in the looks department. I don’t like to sound superficial and focus too much on looks, but it was so in-your-face here that it can’t go without mentioning that there were quite a few not-so-sexy dudes here with what appeared to be seriously-surgeried trophy wives. And I’ve never seen as many boob jobs as I did at Pearl. Not even in Vegas.

    We did meet two awesome couples around our age (late 30s/early 40s) that were PARTY ANIMALS and we’re trying to get them to go to TTR. But these are the only people we even got contact info from. A sleeper, overall, in the people department.

    Nightclub: Fun for a while, and is air-conditioned; much smaller and less crowded than PatyO’s, but empties out early, like around 1am, because ppl go to bed or to the hot tub WHICH HAS NO MUSIC. So you have to bring your own.

    Summary:

    --If your lifelong dream is to seriously overpay for a room/food/drinks/service so you can go nude and have/watch open sex in public, then by all means, knock yourself out and go to Pearl. :bootyshake:

    --If you are dying to look at open chairs around the pool and get chased off of them by staff because they are “reserved”, then by all means, go to Pearl. :aktion060:

    --If you are jonesing to feel like a big shot by tipping out the ass to get service that you should be getting for what you’ve already paid, please, please try out Pearl. :bash:

    --If you can’t stand fun people with party animal/anything goes type of attitude and open minds, by all means, to go Pearl. :mad:

    Otherwise, I suggest you stay with TTR. :mnm:
     
  2. Partyometer

    Partyometer I can choose my own title Registered Member

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    Yay! Jess, I love this review. Sorry you had a shitty time at Pearl but thank you for answering a lot of our questions. As a die- hard TTR fan, We just haven't been able to pull ourselves away to check it out. Hope you see you two back at TTR soon!
     
  3. RnJ

    RnJ Guru Registered Member

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    Great job Jess! After work I'll try to expand on a couple things and add my slightly different take but overall that sums it up.

    And Amy I wouldn't say we had a shitty time, just not what we were hoping for and ended up saying "wish we'd just stayed at TTR" several times a day. :banghead:
     
  4. scottydog

    scottydog I can choose my own title Registered Member

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    I've always followed one good piece of advice I got a long time ago. Never try to be happier than happy. We've always been happy with what TTR provides us for the price. At home, when we go out to eat...it's a sports bar...no wine list...no cloth napkins. What some would call the finer things in life just have no appeal for us. We drink beer and vodka mostly, so upscale drinks don't do much for us either. What we value is having fun and meeting great people to have fun with. Temptation can't be beat at any price for this...and this is what we value above all else on vacation. We take one big trip each year, so to have a disappointing result would really suck. TTR fits our budget, because it allows many long weekend trips around our area because we spend so little going to Cancun...$1200 each for 11 days including airfare. We also have a clothing optional...anything goes/lifestyle campground an hour north of us...so we get plenty of summer and fall weekends filled with at least some of what Desire provides. I know there are plenty of Desire lovers here who have amazing times there, but between the prices and the fact that not everyone values what Desire provides...we're more than happy at TTR.

    Thanks for taking the time for the report!
     
  5. RnJ

    RnJ Guru Registered Member

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    Also - Steve, hope this is OK here. We thought since it's more a comparison to TTR than a straight review that it made sense. We had sooo many people ask us before we left TTR to share our thoughts.
     
  6. jnine

    jnine Guru Registered Member

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    YIKES! Thank you SO MUCH for that extremely well written, detailed report. You really answered a lot of our questions too. I'm sorry you were disappointed in your stay there, but you really did a service for many who might have considered Pearl, although for a little over two nights there we can have our complete vacation at TTR and have a LOT more fun by the sound of it. Hopefully we'll get to meet you two someday, and maybe we can make up for the fun missed on the Pearl misadventure. Thank you again!
     
  7. LadynTramp

    LadynTramp I can choose my own title Registered Member

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    Well...............we love Pearl! The biggest difference in our opinion is that it's much quieter more relaxing than TTR...........depends on what you're looking for. Pearl is expensive but we've never paid close to what the OP did here. Another big deal for us is the no singles thing.........I know.....I know..........not every single guy is an ass........in fact most are great..........but the asses tend to bug us a great deal!

    I respect these folks opinions...................but I truly believe the OP is being a bit harsh.

    BTW..........we love TTR as well!
     
  8. Anna and Chris

    Anna and Chris Enthusiast Registered Member

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    Great review Jess!
     
  9. hot_2_trot

    hot_2_trot Guest

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    The weird thing is, we ARE cloth napkins, nice wine type of people some of the time, and sports bar people some of the time. So we were not afraid of the 'nicer' aspect, we just didn't think it was 'nice' enough in general.
     
  10. MAXXandRACY

    MAXXandRACY Addict Registered Member

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    Thanks for the review!

    And yikes. For that kind of $$$, they should not only GIVE you a deck chair, they should MASSAGE you in one.

    To a happy ending.
     
  11. MAXXandRACY

    MAXXandRACY Addict Registered Member

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    Love that!
     
  12. saram

    saram Regular Registered Member

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    Thanks Jess and Ryan!

    With the pending possible remodeling and closure of TTR we are all scrambling looking for alternatives. From the sounds of your review this would not be the place for our group to go too. I wonder if the resort takes on a different life during take over periods.

    Hopefully another resort loosens the rules for awhile, during the renovations to topless optional and parties.

    I think we were all hoping for better news... :(
     
  13. scottydog

    scottydog I can choose my own title Registered Member

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    I think it was an honest review...it may be harsh, but it was an accurate representation of what they experienced. I'm glad you posted your opinions too, because it makes the important point that everyone's expectations, likes and dislikes are always going to be different. Our likes and dislikes are probably more in line with hot 2 trot. Jamie and I can see a movie...I love it and she hates it. Differing opinions make the world more interesting!
     
  14. Kevin_Ailsha

    Kevin_Ailsha President of the Fireball Nomad Trailerhood Registered Member

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    Jess, once again you affirm BA status. Thanks for your honesty. Just the fact that you two went was enough for us to consider trying it. You saved us money but more importantly our time at a place that would not be for us. We will stick with TTR (especially when ya'll are there!)
     
  15. PinaColadaLuvR

    PinaColadaLuvR Regular Registered Member

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    Thanks for your honest thoughts on DP vs TTR. Is it fair to say we will see you at TTR the whole week next year? And don't forget the Gummies!
     
  16. CaptMorgan

    CaptMorgan Addict Registered Member

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    I agree with most of what Jess said (though I did have some different experiences/observations which I will add in my own TR soon). I think for me the issue is with original resorts, the parent company. If you really think about it, there are a thousand shitty things about TTR to complain about too, and the fact that management doesn't change anything yet asks me to complete a survey at the end of each trip is a gigantic bitch slap in the face.

    And this home boy hates to be bitch slapped, unless it's by Ailsha and on the ass, which is a whole different story.
     
  17. jnine

    jnine Guru Registered Member

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    Good idea on the massage. Maybe we misunderstood something else too... For the $700 do they provide you with the trophy wife as well?
     
  18. CaptMorgan

    CaptMorgan Addict Registered Member

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    Since you mentioned massage. The very expensive "erotic massage" at Pearl? Worth every penny. And worth the whole trip according to Mrs. Morgan!
     
  19. MAXXandRACY

    MAXXandRACY Addict Registered Member

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    It sounds like all-inclusive doesn't mean ALL-inclusive. Pretty sure Desire is BYOB (Bring Your Own Babe).
     
  20. MAXXandRACY

    MAXXandRACY Addict Registered Member

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    But do you have to tip some dude $20 extra to reserve the massage table?