Steph and Dave's HNH review

Discussion in 'Grand Oasis Sens' started by Steph&Dave, Nov 3, 2016.

  1. Steph&Dave

    Steph&Dave Regular Registered Member

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    Basics/Background-
    Three prior TTR trips, HNH and June Junkies, returning for Sens HNH 25 Oct - 2 Nov.

    Resort and first impressions-
    Beautiful resort. Great location on a wide strip of white sandy beach. Crystal blue water. Lots of wind blowing through, made it stay cooler than TTR. The pool layout was gorgeous, but it did involve lots of stairs. Did not deter us, just a little work to get around. The room was clean, good AC, fresh air, simple decor. There were some unexpected hazards. Dark tile everywhere was a constant slip hazard. Ledges that narrow unexpectedly, stairs that wind and change widths, steps in the middle as well as edges of pools. Stayed alert and safe, but some accidents did happen.

    Restaurants/Service-
    This is where I believe the majority of complaints will come from. There were four restaurants that required reservations. We were only able to get reservations at two, the Black Hole and Sakura. You were only allowed to make one reservation per day, and everything was somehow already booked. (As a non-member at TTR, we always had trouble getting reservations as well.)
    The walk-in restaurants for dinner were the Shillabar, Moonlight, and Muerdeme Mucho.
    Late night munchies are set up at the Box restaurant, where you could grab fruit and sandwiches and meats and cheese.
    Overall, the service was poor. The wait staff doesn't speak English well, aren't friendly with introductions or returns to your table during meals, and don't seem to understand how normal restaurant service works. We would have dinner before soup some days, not get the same meal two days in a row, and there seemed to not be enough plates and glasses to serve the room. It seemed as though they were not able to run close to capacity. The menu did not reflect what was actually available.
    The Sakura restaurant, which was the best service we received, was so darkly lit that they brought a flashlight to the table so you could read the menu. The AC dripped on the dark tile, and our waiter wiped out with a stack of plates. Poor guy was out for a good ten seconds, they got him a shot, and he was back to work. You had no chance to see how your meal looked, how the steak was cooked, etc. it was set high in the resort, with glass walls and great views of the skyline. However, there were lights at the windows that blocked the view out. So you had a dark room with blinding light as a view.
    Muerdeme Mucho, we ordered food, and Steph only really wanted chips and guacamole. The waiter was either rude or had no English, and only says "coming". Well, it never came, and dinner arrived with no place setting. We tracked them down for silverware, ate dinner without a return from the waiter, who we could see standing at the door, never to return to the table.
    Moonlight, the Italian, had a menu with salads listed, but if you order one they just send you to a little salad bar. Steph ordered the same pizza three times, it never came out the same way. They had bread but not butter most nights. They had oil and balsamic most nights, but no dish to put it in. And they had hot sauce, Worcestershire, and soy sauce at the table. Salt shakers were routinely empty. People were told to wait, but there were always open tables.
    Overall, it seemed like the staff was undermanned, under equipped, and undertrained.
    To be fair, mid trip I wanted to rip this area a lot more. People were really pissed about service. However, I have been to real resorts, and at a party resort I believe you give up some class to show some ass, so I let it go...

    Alcohol Service/ Party-
    We heard mixed reviews here. Those that prefer a specific brand of alcohol found that you would never get the same alcohol at the same bar two days in a row. You could order Absolute, as an example, here one day, but be sent to another bar the next day. It also seemed to upset the VIP folks, who felt their upgrade may not have given them much return.
    Pool service was excellent. Mauro at the pool worked his butt off for us, and I'm sure he made a small fortune in tips. We always had drinks. Juan at the The Kinky Club learned our drink orders and was fairly quick.
    Armando at the beach bar was good to us too, whenever Mauro was MIA, we could slip down there and grab a drink quick.
    Days-
    Topless at the pools was accepted. It seemed like as our party grew, it allowed others to relax as well. We did get some stares and attention, but not bad enough to affect the mood. It was more of a quiet pool atmosphere, but we had lots of body shots happening and mischief with no interference from staff. They were very accommodating to us. The resort day themes were OK. Beach party was cool, we did guys vs girls beer pong. Topless on the beach. Pool party at Shillabar was OK. Foam party was cool, but with cameras all over we were not as comfortable.
    If your group parties, it will be fun. If you want to watch people party, you're out of luck.
    Night Themes-
    We got some great stares the first couple of days! No one was expecting the pasties and sheer paint and it was fun to shock them a bit. In theme attire, we were not allowed to get drinks at the piano bar, but sent to the Kinky Club. Looked like they wanted to keep the debauchery confined to one area. They had shows every other night down there, which were great, but paused the party until around midnight. The club would stay open until two If There Were People There. The club is very small, but we made the best of the stage (and two stripper poles) and danced all night. Lights and music were good.
    We had some trouble with a drunk creeper our last night bothering a group of ladies. Bartender was notified, security came down, he was removed. They took care of us.
    We were unable to have late night shenanigans in a pool or hot tub, but security was polite in kicking us out.
    Overall, we were able to get away with most of what we could do at TTR. We ran the same themes in the same attire and partied just as hard as ever. We just did it in an environment that wasn't used to it. The resort went out of their way to allow us to push their normal boundaries. I believe they would get better over time if more partying groups went there. I do believe they would need to get better at food service, but I don't think they have had experience with repeat party groups before. By the end of the trip, we were getting them trained.

    Boobs Cruise-
    Always a good time. We had a bus and two vans take us down to the pier. Sad to see the construction site. Sad to pull back in without the beach return party. Still a great time. Didn't get in trouble pulling up to a Mexican navy ship to deliver a bathing suit bottom. Good times!


    HNH was a blast to be part of, and we would do it again at any resort anywhere in the world. Thanks to everyone involved, we loved meeting new people and kicking ass with old friends.
     
  2. Donald

    Donald Devil's advocate Registered Member

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    Thanks for the review ,,, I wonder what non-members are writing on Trip Advisor lol
     
  3. Fredmgill

    Fredmgill Guru Registered Member

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    Great Report guys, so dead on with the restaurants and service. We also experienced the inconsistency in the food and level of service. I believe this is more a reflection on the training and expectations set by the resort rather than the individuals performance. Like you mentioned, I think many of the staff made more in tips that week than they had in a long time. Seems like the more experienced stepped up their game.
    Such a great week with you guys... Sure hope it happens next year!!!
    P&L
     
  4. Steve

    Steve Administrator Owner

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    Thanks for the great review.

    Regarding drinks we were there for half a day and one of the bartenders was definitely pouring rot gut vodka from a Smirnoff bottle.

    Couldn't drink it, so asked for same drink from a different bar. Tried them side by side and there was a definite difference, one being drinkable the other tasting like gasoline.
     
  5. aaronheidi74

    aaronheidi74 Regular Registered Member

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    Great review Dave! Spot on. The one star of show foodwise for us was Benazuza! True white table cloth service. But Thank god for you, Steph and the rest of the crew...you all are what made it memorable for us!


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
  6. Steph&Dave

    Steph&Dave Regular Registered Member

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    Heidi with her crop didn't hurt the atmosphere either.
     
  7. Todd And Aaron

    Todd And Aaron Enthusiast Registered Member

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    Hey great review. Is there any beach volleyball to break up the day? We are headed there in Dec.
     
  8. ajay

    ajay HnH Repeat Offenders Registered Member

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    They had pool volleyball almost everyday. They also had pool games. They had music too but needed to be a bit louder.


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